Archive of Posts

My Night Trapped in the Body of an Overgrown Beetle

It was a cold winter's eve. The wind rustled the few remaining leaves of the lone tree in my shitty back garden. The temperature was steadily dropping and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. I looked at the stars, shining brightly when I noticed one was brighter than usual.

Dear Cadbury...

A letter sent to Cadbury Ireland in 2005. No reply has been received to date.

Better Late Than Never

Kevin Chegger was a normal man – well, as normal as any man gets. He went to college and studied commerce. He had a well paying job and a wonderful wife named Betty.

A Man Walks into a Bar

Terry the barman stood behind his mighty bar filling the dishwasher with glasses. A man walked into the pub. His name was Edward. Edward approached the bar. Terry finished putting the dirty glasses into their cleaning machine and acknowledged Edward’s presence.

The Y Conference

Over 2,500 linguists and English language specialists from around the world gathered this week to decide if the letter Y is a vowel, a consonant or both. The letter has hovered in character limbo for years and linguists finally want to set in stone its status.

Steve Higginson's Top Ten Planets

Coming in at the bottom of the list is the closest planet to the sun, Mercury. It is, in most ways, just a terrible, terrible planet. However, it made the list above other planets because it is the sole source of quicksilver in the solar system.

Emergency!

Don't bother dialling 911, here's the real number.

George Clooney in the News

Reading the news recently it occurred to me that any news article can be changed to be about George Clooney and still make sense.

The Truth About Chuck Norris

This Internet thing is all the rage these days and one thing that’s raging even more ragingly than the Internet itself is the phenomenon of Chuck Norris facts. Unfortunately the Chuck Norris facts are not facts at all, but something entirely different, something that is the complete opposite of facts, something dark and sinister. I like to call them – lies.

Happy Birthday, Ted Davis

Today, March 11th 2006, is the first birthday of Two Sided Rubber Ducky. This day one year ago the website’s first article was posted, along with the very first Steve Higginson’s Top Ten, and gooey, creamy history was made.