Dear Nestlé...

A letter sent to Nestlé Ireland in 2005. No reply has been received to date.

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing you to voice my concerns for your Kit Kat product. I’ve discontinued purchasing it for the reasons stated in this letter. I of course continue to buy your other fine products but Kit Kats are now forbidden in my household.

The packaging of a Kit Kat bar is red. Red is both the colour of the Devil (Satan, the Prince of Darkness, Lucifer, Beelzebub, Baal) and Communism. I do not know the country in which your company was founded but I do not support anything other than Democracy in Ireland, brotherland of America.

Also your package label contain warnings for nuts for those allergic to them but there is no warning for the lactose intolerant. You are selling milk chocolate which could easily down someone suffering from the affliction with a mild stomach pain. I feel that one third to a half of the front of the wrapper should be dedicated to a lactose warning.

Finally, on this day, the birthday of Jennifer Aniston, I’ve found a passage in the bible that supports my concerns. Mainly, my concern of using damaged Kit Kat bars as part of new bars. This is similar to feeding cows to living cows. I do not wish to get Chocolate Spongiform Encephalopathy from your products. The passage is as follows:

“And if the burnt sacrifice for his offering to the LORD be of fowls, then he shall bring his offering of turtledoves, or of young pigeons.” (Leviticus 1:14)

Yours Sincerely,
Steve Higginson